i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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