So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
