omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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