You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
