I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
