i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
