im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he was CRYING into my vagina
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
