i just google imaged poop.
Sober January is a disaster.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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