So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Use "feeling words"
Yay
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize