was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
