Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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