You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
