Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We left an ass print on the piano.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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