Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
