Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize