i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
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