Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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