i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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