Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
