dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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