is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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