Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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