That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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