She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize