spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
