there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
