are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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