i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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