is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
