But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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