Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Pants are for mortals
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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