i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize