Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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