No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
