With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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