im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize