we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize