I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
