But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Drunk is not a location!
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
