Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize