He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
