you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
