Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Randomize
