Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
two words...techno handjob
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize