just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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