bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
