just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
