i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
