i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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