she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I am one with the molecules
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize